Back to Work I Go

I know why caffeine was invented. I thought I knew before baby because if I didn’t have my morning coffee I wouldn’t be as productive at work as I wanted to be. It helped me focus and work reallyreallyfast. Now, it is the key to my survival. It is the one thing that assures me I will not die of exhaustion if I go ahead and get ready for work after Peanut’s morning feeding instead of bringing her back into bed with me for a snugly morning nap. So, here’s to you freshly brewed french vanilla with almond milk and hazelnut flavored splenda! I owe you my life paycheck.

I’m on day two of wearing my “working mom” hat. My emotional status is surprisingly stable. But I think that is due to a) I get to leave my teeny baby with her Nana who has mad mothering skills and b) I am too tired/busy to really think about being devastated. Until P sends a cute morning pic of the peanut having a blast during tummy time while I’m locked in a supply closet, topless, hooked up to a milking machine. Then my eyes fill with tears and the Woe Is Me comes back. But it lasts for a total of a minute because then I have to get it together and rush back upstairs to my desk because oh my gosh pumping takes WAAAY longer than I thought it would and I hope no one is looking for me!!!!

Work itself isn’t that stressful and everyone has been really nice and understanding so far. I HAVE gotten the “so, did it take long to lose the weight???...how much did you gain???” comments. But if pregnancy prepared me for one thing, it’s people asking inappropriate/private questions with wild abandon. And I have developed the ability to answer right back with zero very little insecurity. Yes, I gained 60 pounds. Yes 60. YES 60. No, I did not have twins. (This was actually a question asked. By a man. I deserve a pat on the back for not throat punching him for the benefit of all womankind)

The hardest part of my day is AFTER work. I’m trying to pack in a whole day’s worth of activities into a few hours, so I schedule to the minute. Work out while baby is still sleeping, feed baby, make dinner, eat dinner, get things ready for the next day, feed baby, bathe baby, snuggle baby, book, prayers, put to bed, me time, shower, and bed. Of course all of you experienced moms out there have a smirk on your face because you know the key to this schedule is BABY doing what you plan on them doing. So, needless to say, my night did in no way resemble my cute little schedule. Here is what actually happened: work out while baby is still sleeping…for fifteen minutes and then waaaa I don’t want to nap mom!!! so then feed baby, try to put baby back down because she is sooo overtired because she didn’t nap for Nana at all, pick baby back up in response to loud protests, hand baby off to P who just walked in the door, start dinner, feed baby again because there is NO consoling her, give baby back to P, finish dinner, take inconsolable baby back and shush and rock to sleep, eat with one hand while taking care not to disturb unconscious baby on shoulder, ahhhh relax on couch with sleeping baby for 5 min until baby wakes up, feed baby, bathe baby, book, prayers, put to bed, then OH MY WORD I’M SO TIRED I CAN’T SEE STRAIGHT, fall in bed, no me time, no shower. Lesson learned. Babies scoff at attempted scheduling.

In the world of Peanut, she is fabulous and fantastic, despite the lapse in sleeping skills yesterday. Her newest development…loving bath time even more than before. She’s always smiled and giggled during bath time, and it seemed to relax her because she would just chill in her little seat. Now she has discovered how much MORE fun it is to splash and wiggle and basically cause a ruckus. She is thisclose to flinging herself out of her seat and I’m sure if I turned my back for a second she would succeed and I would have a heart attack. Note to self – work on catlike reflexes.

She is also now a drooler. Like whoa. Like dripping down my arm when I’m holding her. Delicious. I’m not entirely convinced it’s not due to the early signs of teething. Yes, I know it’s seriously early. But I teethed at 3 months, and my mom teethed earlier than that, so it is a definite possibility. Wouldn’t that be fun for all of us in the Peanut household?

In summary…I heart coffee, boys say dumb things, and Peanut runs the show.

Ten Weeks with the Peanut

I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted an update on the peanut! She celebrated her 10 week birthday on Saturday while in sunny south Florida. My mom and I made the trip for the weekend, and she did great! She is a wonderful traveler, although she gets sick of the car seat after too long and tries to rip herself out of it.

This is my last week of maternity leave and I am DREADING going back to work. I don't care if I sound like a whiny baby. I want to cross my arms, stomp my feet and wail "IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!". Yes, I am fortunate to have a job. Yes, I am so lucky my mom is going to watch her for my first month back. Yes, I know millions of moms do it every day. But, at the end of the day, I still don't want to leave my teeny tiny baby who STILL NEEDS HER MOMMY! I'm just being honest. Humor me and let me complain because no matter what they say...yes, it kinda does make me feel better.

Peanut is growing up soooo fast! She is currently 11 pounds and 3 ounces. She has infinite amounts of personality. She likes to stare at her hands, and then taste them. She is still on the same sleep schedule, waking only once at night and then taking her first morning nap in bed with me. She still spits up like a champ. I love to squeeze her chubby baby thighs and nibble her teeny toes. What is it about cute babies that makes you want to chew on them? She also LOVES to talk. We have conversations about everything. And she has STRONG opinions. I'm sure this is a sign of things to come...she'll take after her mommy with an affinity for sharing her thoughts...possibly over sharing.

In other news, did you know oreos are dairy free?? I do. I know several packages worth. Did you also know that you can order Papa Johns without cheese and it's dairy free? And that the garlic butter dipping sauce is too (which is kinda scary...what is it then?)? I do. Several times over. So my weight loss plan is going FANTASTIC (yes, that was sarcasm...possibly another trait peanut will receive from her mother). The plan is to reign it all in when I go back to work. We will be on a tight schedule anyway, so I might as well start back grocery shopping and...gasp...making dinner. Because I need to be ok with my bod in a bathing suit. I have a long standing love affair with the beach and needless to say, I must indoctrinate my child ASAP. And just as I was getting the hang of surfing, I got pregnant and the belly wouldn't allow paddling out on a hard board. So...it's t minus one month until it's officially warm enough to hit the sand. Here's hoping I can control myself!

One and a Half Minutes...

of pure vocal talent. She's going to be a rock star. Well...she rocks out to praise and worship music anyway.

Dear Little Peanut,

You are TWO MONTHS old today!! I can't believe it. Life without you seems like a million years ago, yet I feel like we've only had you for a minute! Your Dad and I love you so much. You get tons of snuggles and kisses every day, and for right now you like it and let us without complaint. I am cherishing this stage where your favorite place to be is in our arms and you can't run away :-) We are so proud of you and can't wait to see what adventures you create for us. This is our last month at home together, and I am so sad I will have to leave you to go back to work. But no matter what happens, know that I love you and my favorite place to be is in the nursery playing and laughing with you.

Facts about YOU:

- You had your two month appointment and got a gold star on your report. You are 10 pounds 12 ounces and 22 1/2 inches long. You also got your first shot. Your face got all red and you CRIED...for, like, a second. The moment I picked you up you stopped crying, smiled at your Nana, and feel dead asleep. So really it was more traumatic for me. Here's a pic of your first bandaid:

- You are still in size one diapers, but they are getting a bit snug. But I'm going to try to keep you in them for a while longer because we have a million.

- Your 0-3 clothes are getting too small! I thought I had one more month of you in them, but it looks like we'll be bringing out the 3-6 this week.

- You love to smile and giggle, and lately you LOVE to talk. Even though you're not saying real words, we have long conversations all the time.

- Your favorite toy is the monkey on your playmat. You talk to him a LOT, and even yell at him sometimes. You also love your mirror and will stare at your reflection for a while laughing at yourself.

- You love to watch the TV when Daddy has you in his lap. I don't allow this most of the time, but once in a while you two will watch a show together.

- You are enthralled with ceiling fans. Sometimes when I'm getting ready to go somewhere I just put you in the middle of our bed and you talk to the fan.

- You love sucking your thumb and fingers when you're going to sleep. I'll let you for now, just know that you're not allowed to be a thumb sucking teenager.

- You go to bed at 9:30 and wake up hungry around 3:30, and then start your day at 7:30. On days I'm feeling lazy I'll bring you in bed with me after you eat in the morning and we'll nap together until 9.

- You love to nap and hardly ever cry when I put you down. And you almost always wake up smiling.

- You're getting a lot more hair, and it is still brown but getting lighter. Your eyes are EXACTLY the same color as your Daddy's.

- You spit up all. the. time. Usually on a clean outfit. Or on my shoulder, down my back, and on the floor.

- You had your first trip to Nana and Grandad's house. You did amazing, which is a relief. You're so laid back we can pretty much take you anywhere.

In summary, you are an amazing daughter and we love you more than anything.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above..." James 1:17

There are Things Moms Should Teach Their Daughters

Like how to take a picture of yourself and your friends without cutting any one's head off or getting the mile long arm look. So we practiced this morning. Please disregard my left over makeup and disheveled hair. Or the fact that peanut and I are still in our PJs.

She was a bit skeptical at first...

...but she got into it after a few tries.

And here are a few more of the Peanut solo. I just can't help myself. She likes when I tickle her sides...funny cause I HATE that.

Tummy time. It's not her favorite but she'll humor me for five minutes or so.

I just love this girl!!

I'm not sure if you can tell from the pictures, but her rash has returned a bit on her cheeks. It's only been there a couple days, so I've been racking my brain for the cause. Because it has to be something I ate. But I've been so careful! I even tell restaurants about being dairy free and make them promise my order does not contain one molecule of that nasty stuff. So, just as I'm getting worked up about those lying waiters spiking my meals with poison (aka dairy), I look down at the container in my hand. You see it's morning (ok, early afternoon...not the point) and I'm making coffee. I had been splurging on Starbucks almost every day since giving birth, and the insane expense finally made do the tough thing and...gasp...I now make my own coffee. With delicious hazelnut NON-DAIRY creamer. Did you know NON-DAIRY or LACTOSE FREE means yes, I contain the ingredient that hurts your baby?!?! So, I would like to accept this worst mom of the year award with a special thanks to my caffeine addiction and my inability to read labels. Back to Starbucks I go, and make it a venti soy latte please.